Listening.

Today is just one of those days that comes around every once in a while when all I want to do is read...and write. I think that reading is where I gain understanding of things, and then writing is the way that I express it and actually comprehend what I've learned. Not that I have learned it...it's more that God has taught it to me and I have chosen to listen. Listening. Mmm. I cannot describe the power of listening...everyone needs to just listen sometimes. I would actually say that everyone should have a day when they just listen...not that you have to be completely silent, because that is not the essence of true listening...but you would be amazed at the ways that the Lord will teach you things: through hearing parts of other peoples' conversations, through putting your will aside and committing to read the Bible for all it's worth, through just sitting to listen to the wisdom of a leader in your life, through just observing the sounds of nature and realizing how magnificent God is for creating everything, through listening to the words that people don't say.

Listening is a sign that you truly care for someone. I think that it is a practical way to share the love that God has given us...it involves restraint and self-control on the part of the listener, meaning that they do not try to interrupt or interject while the other person is talking. God never ceases to amaze me in this area (well, any area, really)...I've found that when I sincerely listen to someone, they begin to share more and more with me...more than I can ever handle, without the Lord. He will put people in your path who need to be encouraged and strengthened...something that none of us can really do unless we rely on God. Listening to what someone has on their heart involves simultaneously listening to what God wants you to say to encourage the downtrodden.

"Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry." --James 1:19

Where Else Can I Go?

I don't have a whole lot of thoughts on this topic, but quite recently God has been revealing to me the power of His presence.

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." --Psalm 139:7-10

Tanya and I are reading through Jonah right now...a story that I thought I had down pat...but isn't it marvelous how the Lord reveals new things every time we commit ourselves to reading His Word? (it's repetitive from the last post, I know...please accept my apologies.) This time, God was showing me that even though Jonah fled from the Lord, He was still in control and was not surprised by Jonah's actions...even though it would have been much easier on everyone if Jonah had just agreed to go to Ninevah in the first place, God's purposes were still eventually fulfilled. What a lesson for us...the stubborn and selfish people that we are...that if we just do what God asks us to do the first time without questioning or doubting His authority, we can be much more fruitful with the time we save.

"'Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone--while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?'" --Job 38:4-7

Talk about putting things in perspective. Wow. How can we ever make light of the Lord's sovereignty? We, the creation, are nothing compared with the glorious splendor of the Lord God Almighty, the Creator. So when God tells us to do something, not only would it save time and energy if we just obeyed, but we should just trust Him because He is God!

I need you Jesus

To come to my rescue

Where else can I go?

There's no other name

By which I am saved

Capture me with grace

I will follow you.

No one compares to our God. No one. Got that? He is above all and in all and through all. With that being said, who can know better than Him? No one. So follow Him...no matter where He leads. He will stretch you farther than you ever wanted to be stretched, but you will grow more and more in Him so that He can use you for bigger things that you've ever dreamed for yourself. He alone can rescue, He alone can save.

Spring Green

Other than Carolina blue, there is no better color than spring green in the leaves of the trees that have just come back to life after withstanding a cold and climate-confused winter...in my opinion...you are more than welcome to think what you want to.

Armanti Edwards went in the second round of the NFL draft the other day...to the Carolina Panthers! I just think that is exciting.

Even though the semester is almost over, it doesn't seem like it because I have this silly online philosophy class that has a never-ending load of work...and my brain doesn't work that way, so it's rough. But I'm just trying to learn what I can and not think too much about how these tests I've had to take are going to affect my final grade...I know that they will have a profound impact and I'm not in denial, but I'd rather just not think about it...I'm placing my trust in the Lord's hands for that one.

I just think it's amazing how God's Word is alive...every time I read a passage, I get something else out of it that I had missed before. And even if you read the Bible 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for your entire life, I'm convinced that God would continue to reveal things to you and teach you through it. In church today, I opened up my Bible to look up a verse that I thought of in the midst of the sermon...I started reading that verse and the context and such...and before I knew it, I had read 4 chapters of Isaiah. I would have kept reading, but church was over...I just find that astounding!

It's rather frustrating to have to read and study for class when I would be perfectly content just sitting and listening to the Word of God. Yes, I know...I, Kelsey Noelle Willis (the girl who despises sitting still), just said that I would be happy doing just that. Most of the time, I feel like I need to be doing something all the time...I like being busy more than anything else...and sometimes I intentionally schedule too many things than can possibly be accomplished in a day. But I'm beginning to realize that there are times throughout the day and sometimes full days at a time when God just gives me the time to be still and learn from Him in one way or another. It is rather difficult to hear from the Lord when you are too busy to even start working on your homework until midnight.

Take a deep breath and trust.

Spiritual Asthma

Asthma is most simply described this way: there is a specific air capacity that your lungs are capable of holding...when you have asthma, your lungs stay 1/4 of the way inflated at all times, thus only allowing you to fill up your lungs 3/4 of the way when you inhale deeply...after a few breaths, your lungs begin to breathe in more and more in order to receive the oxygen they need...then your brain gets involved and starts freaking out because you can't get all the oxygen you need, thus making your breathing faster and less productive.

I have diagnosed myself with spiritual asthma lately...I know it's a stretch, but just go with me on this one. Sometimes, we can just get so busy that we don't have a chance to come up for air...even if our days are consumed with doing the Lord's work, we can still have a void in our relationship with Him. Closeness in proximity is not closeness in intimacy...but that is for another post. Sometimes we can get so overwhelmed and overloaded with the work that the Lord has called us to that we cannot even take a breath and experience the life worth living that He wants us to live. This happens when we try to bear the burdens on our own. What is it about human nature that makes us think that we are powerful enough to take care of every little detail of our lives? We continually pile more and more responsibilities on our already full plates without seeking what God will have us do...we must allow Him to teach us the ever-important word "no." When we have more to do than there are hours in the day, it is hard not to start "hyperventilating"...then it seems like our lives are spinning out of control, when all we really need is our "inhaler," our Savior, Jesus Christ. (I know that "inhaler" is a terrible analogy for the Maker of all Heaven and Earth, but it fits.)

"Be still and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world." --Psalm 46:10

Take a deep breath. Cast your burdens upon the only One who can do anything about them. Trust Him.

With All of My Heart

"As slaves of Christ, do the will of God with all your heart. Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." --Ephesians 6:6-7

The Lord alone is worthy of all we have to give...even though what we have is not much at all...we have our lives, which He has so graciously given to us to serve His purposes on this earth...and the motivator of our lives is our hearts (in a very limited view). The condition of our hearts determines our effectiveness in living our lives for the Lord, always striving for His glory. It affects everything we do in life. And if we give our hearts away to the pursuit of things other than the Lord, we will never be fulfilled. The God who created the universe deserves to be served...even if it is by the imperfect and fallible human beings He made in His image.

"Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name." --Psalm 103:1

I can't help but think of the song "Half of My Heart" by John Mayer...he talks about how he can't keep loving the girl in the song with half of his heart. As theologically unsound (if that's even a word) as the song is, because he talks about how he has never loved anything with more than half of his heart, Christians should adopt this mindset. This is like the concept of being lukewarm...halfway in, halfway out...sitting on the fence. We cannot settle for "orbiting" around God...we should desire to draw closer and closer to Him every day...we need to yearn. How can we be content with being comfortable? Even a dead fish can swim downstream. People should notice something different in us...we are called to be set apart in this world...we need to be lights in this dark society in which we live.

"The Word gave life to everything that was created, and his life brought light to everyone. The light shines in the darkness and the darkness can never extinguish it." --John 1:9

When we surrender our hearts to the Lord, He can use us in mighty ways...to illuminate the darkness and give light to those who have been blinded by the darkness.

Letting Go

What if all the things we have laid out for ourselves in the future, that would accomplish lots of work for the Kingdom, is not what the Lord has planned for us? What if we have spent years and years seeking certain endeavors just to find that the Lord was leading us a different way? There is a sense in which we have the free will to choose to do certain things that would further the Lord's Kingdom and be successful in spreading Christ's love with those who haven't known it...but I think that if we surrender our plans and submit our lives to the Lord, He can do things that are much bigger and more substantial.

When we let go, He will probably do things through us and in our lives that seem to make no sense whatsoever...these things not only test and strengthen our faith, but they also become stepping stones to the future that God has called us to. Proverbs 20:24 says "The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?"

If we look at life as a journey...or maybe a hike up a mountain...there will be times when we are hiking full force at what seems to be a 45 degree angle, completely exhausted--the Lord will be our strength...there will be times when the path is flat and we are exposed to the glory of the sunlight---the Lord will be our companion...there will be times when there are roots and rocks obstructing the way, when we may stumble and fall, get all scratched up and bruised, and just want to stay down on the ground--the Lord will pick us up and brush us off, giving us the perseverance that develops endurance, which develops strength of character, which strengthens our confident hope of salvation (sorry, had to get some Romans 5 in there)...then there will be times when we come to the top of a peak, only to find that we are headed straight for a valley and we are nowhere near the top--the Lord will encourage us to remind us that He is constantly teaching us...there will be times when He throws things into our path that we were not expecting at all, that we must learn to use to continue on our journey--the Lord is constant and He will never change...and there will be times when we do not listen to His counsel to set up camp and call it a night, when we try to venture out and follow the path on our own in the dark---the Lord will be with us all the time and welcome us back with open arms; He will be our Light.

Even though I cannot see the way, the Lord created the map. He is building this passion within me for the goals and dreams that He has given me and I know that there is no way I can ever get there on my own...no way! But He is always there and He never fails...I must daily surrender and let go of all that I am. I am His and He is mine.

Don't Believe the Lies.

Satan is terrible. Ok, that's an understatement. Put dook basketball, unsweet tea, donating blood, and graphing linear equations together and you have 1/1,000th of the terrible-ness of Satan. But he is so believable...he knows just what to say and how to say it that makes us actually think that he is right. Just like little brothers know the things that push our buttons and annoy us until Kingdom come, the devil is strategic in planting seeds of doubt that eventually break ground and begin to overtake our thoughts...much like ivy covers the walls of a brick house.

"They traded the truth about God for a lie. So they worshiped and served the things God created instead of the Creator himself, who is worthy of eternal praise! Amen." --Romans 1:25

So be it. God is truth...and when we allow ourselves to abandon our faith in that fact, we are in trouble. When we take our eyes off of the absolute truth that the Lord embodies and reveals to us, Satan gets the little bit of room that he needs to whisper lies in our ears. And for some reason, it must be our sinful nature, we begin to believe the lies more than the truth...how ridiculous! In Romans, this process of trading the truth for lies is directly connected to worshiping and serving the creation rather than the Creator. Listening to Satan simply mixes up our priorities. Can I "amen" myself?!

God is the source of all. He created all. And He is the standard for all. God is all we need.

Two Things...

Don't you just love it when God reveals something to you that you have known for quite a while, but have never fully comprehended? That is one of the most fulfilling moments in my day...that "aha!" moment gives me such joy. Thus far today, the Lord has taught me that only when our identities are found in Christ will we find out who we really are. I've known for a while, and recently been reminded through a particular song that I have come to like, that my identity is found in the God I trust; but I had never connected that to the solidification of my true identity as a woman of God. For so long, I had found myself wrapping my identity up in the identities of other people and becoming more and more like them, simply because I did not know myself well enough to know the difference. I had not sought the Lord and asked Him to shape and mold me into the person that I need to be so that I can effectively become who He has created me to be. The Lord has provided me so many confirmations along the way as well, that I've only now recognized. Back in high school, when all I wanted to do was have friends, I would find people who had qualities that I wanted to emulate, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, and changed until I became more and more like them. That characteristic of wanting to emulate the traits of others is exactly what I needed to employ, but I needed to strive to be like Christ rather than other flawed humans. No one wants a friend who is exactly like they are, so as a result, most of those friendships turned south...and because I did not realize what I was doing at the time, I was torn up about those failures. How ironic that one of the people I wanted to be like so badly in high school is now one of my very best friends...but we only became close when I surrendered to God and let Him define me.

My other thought of the day is that I am finding it extremely difficult to discern between what I want and what the Lord wants. There are several situations right now in which I think I know what would be best, but I have to pray for the Lord's will. When I began praying that the Lord would purify my heart, I didn't imagine that He would test me like this so soon...but that is exactly what is going on. I have to choose between praying for a certain thing to happen or for certain doors to open and sincerely praying for the Lord's will. He has proved Himself faithful time and time again, yet somehow I have the audacity to think that I know what is best. This should not be! So...I need to submit.

More To Come

Isn't our Lord magnificent? There is really no other way to describe Him, with my insufficient and extremely limited understanding and vocabulary. He is so far above anything we could ever comprehend. He has taken care of every situation in the lives of each and every person He has ever created...which is everyone, if you were wondering. I was reading for my philosophy test today and the topic of the section was the difference between predestination and divine foreknowledge. I know that this is a gigantic subject, but I'm only going to touch on one thing. After the author described the two schools of thought, he said that there is a third option, which he calls divine timelessness. He says: "God's existence is not everlasting; it is timeless, outside of time altogether." When I read this, I couldn't help but stop and think about it for a minute...it is so true. God created everything...including time...so He is not restricted at all. While it is true that He knows what is going to happen in our lives before we are even born, that is somewhat irrelevant...He existed before time existed, so He really knew everything about us before He created the concept of time! Is that amazing to anyone else?!

It could be just because I am so business-minded and I constantly plan things, but I've really been thinking about time lately. While it seems like we have all the time in the world to do whatever it is we want to do, to find God's purpose for our lives, to build relationships with people, etc., we do not. We are told that our lives are like a vapor in comparison to the eternity that we will spend in Heaven (if eternity even has a concept of time). There should be a sense of urgency in the way we live our lives...but we must seek what the Lord will have us do with our time. I, for one, cannot be trusted to allocate my time properly...I get too wrapped up in the little things to realize that I need to be concerned with the big things. This is where I am right now...stuck between what I feel like I have to do now and the things that I know really matter in the long run. The Lord has been revealing to me lately the fact that He has bigger things for me to do than I have planned for myself...which is why I need Him...so much...more than I even think I do. I can accomplish nothing on my own...though my pride deceives me into thinking so. But pride is a liar...if I do not walk through the doors that the Lord opens for me, then nothing I can do will ever be enough. However, the faith necessary to walk through those doors...no matter what the consequences...is the same faith that will allow the Lord to use me for Kingdom work. That is the hope of more to come.